Facebook Status of Animals?

If animals have Facebook, these are most likely to be their Status Updates:

Cockroach: Managed to skip from some one’s foot step.. Man, I lead a dangerous lifestyle! :P

Chicken: If tomorrow I am not updating my status, means I am being served at KFC. Love you all ♥

Octopus: I have just refilled my ink..horray!! ^_^

Pig: Oh gosh they throw the gossips that I am spreading flu…WTF!! :X

Goat : Friends, don’t go out, Eid holiday is coming :'(

Pig writes a comment on Goat’s status: "Luckily I am haram" |4 likes (Y)|

Goat replies: "Don’t you remember that after Eid is the Chinese new year..

National Anthem of Nepal modified for Politicians

सयौं खाले नेता हामी एउटै पद सभासद ।
देश बेच्छौं पेट पाल्छौं अनि बन्छौं गदगद ।।

प्रकृतिका कोटी कोटी पापिष्टका नायक,
नाङ्गो नाच देखाउने लोकतन्त्रका गायक ।

ज्ञान शून्य शान्ति शून्य महिषासुरका सन्तान,
लाउन हुन्न खान हुन्न किन चाहियो विधान -

जे गरे नि चुपै बस्ने जनता छन् कमाल,
हाम्ले चुसी खोक्रो भएको जय जय नेपाल ।।

Water Survey Result

BUT few people who drinks poison survives... :D

Difference between boys and girls

Please post your feedback?

Psychiatrist and patient with wired dreams

A guy tells his psychiatrist,
“I always have this weird dream at night. 
I am locked in a room with a door on which there is a sign. 
I try to push it with all my strength, but no matter how hard I try, it won’t budge."


The psychiatrist muses, “Interesting." 


But tell me what does the sign on the door say? 

Boss and Secretary

BOSS to secretory:for 1 week we'll go aboard

She calls husband :for a week,i and boss r going abroad

Husband calls GF :wife going,lets enjoy

GF calls her student:for one week,you're free

Little boy calls grandpa:i'm free for 1 week

Hair cut of a ghost

A ghost went to the barber for a haircut. The barber said, "I am very busy now. Come back after a few hours".